Funny Interview Jokes

एक, नवयुवक आईएएस का इंटरव्यू देने गया...........@@@
उससे पूछा गया भारत को आजा़दी कब मिली ?
उसने कहा “प्रयास तो काफी पहले शुरू हो गए थे पर सफलता 1947 में मिली...........@@@
फिर उससे पूछा गया,
“हमें आजा़दी दिलाने में महत्वपूर्ण भुमिका किसने निभाई...........@@@
वह बोला, “इसमें कई लोगों का योगदान रहा, किसका नाम बताऊं ?
यदि किसी एक का नाम लेता हूं तो अन्य के साथ अन्याय होगा...........@@@
“क्या भ्रष्टाचार हमारे देश का सबसे बड़ा दुश्मन है...........@@@

“इस बारे में शोध चल रहा है। सही उत्तर मैं तभी दे पाऊंगा जब रिपोर्ट
देख लूं...........@@@
इंटरव्यू बोर्ड इस नवयुवक के ओरिजनल उत्तरों से बेहद खुश हुआ...........@@@
उन्होंने नवयुवक को जाने को कहा, पर यह हिदायत दी कि वह बाहर बैठे 
अन्य उम्मीदवारों को ये प्रश्न न बताए क्योंकि वे यही प्रश्न उनसे भी पूछेंगे...........@@@
जब नवयुवक बाहर आया तो अन्य उम्मीदवारों ने उससे पूछा कि उससे क्या
प्रश्न पूछे गए हैं। इसने बताने से इन्कार कर दिया...........@@@
तब पप्पू ने कहा कि यदि प्रश्न नहीं बता सकते तो उत्तर ही बता दो।
नवयुवक ने उत्तर बता दिए...........@@@
अब पप्पू गया इंटरव्यू देने।
इंटरव्यू बोर्ड ने उससे पूछा”आपकी जन्मतिथि क्या है...........@@@
पप्पू-” प्रयास तो काफी पहले शुरू हो गए थे पर सफलता 1947 में मिली...........@@@
इंटरव्यू बोर्ड वाले कन्फ्यूज हो गए। उन्होंने अगला प्रश्न दागा,
“आपके पिताजी का नाम क्या है...........@@@
पप्पू-“इसमें कई लोगों का योगदान रहा, किसका नाम बताऊं?यदि किसी 
एक का नाम लेता हूं तो अन्य के साथ अन्याय होगा...........@@@
बोर्ड वाले हक्के बक्के रह गए। उन्होंने कहा,
“क्या तुम पागल हो गए हो...........@@@
पप्पू-“इस बारे में शोध चल रहा है। सही उत्तर मैं तभी दे पाऊंगा जब रिपोर्ट
देख लूं...........@@@
पोस्ट पढ़ने के बाद हंसी आई तो लाइक और शेयर करना मत भूलिेयेगा...........@@@


  • Interviewer: Tell me about yourself. 

  • Candidate: I am Kondesh Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication

  • engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology. 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never

  • heard of this college before!

  • Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission

  • into it . What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th.I

  • was getting a paid seat in a good college.

  • But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of

  • money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on

  • you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao

  • Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your

  • engineering.

  • Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know ,

  • these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments..It is

  • difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 +

  • 2 = 7 years. 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6. 

  • Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to

  • keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really

  • affect exams a lot. I think they ! should ban it.

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

  • Candidate: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!! 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life? 

  • Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought

  • I would complete it.

  • In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in

  • BEST(Bus corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative...

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study? 

  • Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself

  • was so much of pain!! 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you

  • worked?

  • Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current

  • platform . Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As

  • you can see I have experience of different platforms ! (Vashi and Andheri

  • are the places in Mumbai) 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: And which languages have you used? 

  • Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German,

  • French, Russian and ma! ny other languages.

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB? 

  • Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher

  • version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new

  • language VD!

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer : Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

  • Candidate : Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our

  • ministers and MPs use in assembly .. 

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: What is your general project experience? 

  • Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of th! e times

  • they are in pipeline!

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job? 

  • Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining

  • BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was

  • another software like Windows.

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience? 

  • Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I

  • can talk a lot. I ! know how to dial for International phone call and use

  • speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like -

  • 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines'

  • , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

  • **********************************

  • Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company? 

  • Candidate: Not much.

  • 1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.

  • 2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have

  • deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent. 

  • 3. I believe in flexi-timings.

  • 4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and

  • jeans. 

  • 5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to

  • avoid breakdown due to overwork. 

  • 6. I wo! uld like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2

  • months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But

  • considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007,I don't

  • mind going there in that period . As you can see I am modest and don't

  • have many expectations. So can I assume my selection? 

  • **********************************

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