New funnyjokes



  • Woh humain kaafir kehte hain to kehte rahen Faraz,,

  • Ami kehti hain jo kehta hai wohi hota hai,,

  • ****************************************

  • hamari guftagoo mai khushboo Q na hogi faraz..

  • ham ne aik umar guzaari hai zahoor raja jaani ka paan khaate hue,,

  • ****************************************

  • Bohat es ko bulata ho bohat samjhta ho lekin

  • ye aeyny may betha shaks baher kuin nay ata

  • ****************************************

  • My SCIENCE Book Says and I Agree

  • CELL Is The Basic Fundamental Unit Of Life

  • ****************************************
  • Wife to doc:- Doc I think my husband has a fearful 
  • diseaseI talk to him for hours and he doesn’t hear a word I say

  • Doc:-That’s not a disease its a gift

  • ****************************************

  • Wife pings husband on whatsapp:- call kr bc balance khtm ho gya hai Urgent

  • It took15 minutes for husband to understand that bc means “Because”

  • ****************************************

  • What is painful line for single boys,

  • Aur suna bhabi kaise hai,

  • ****************************************

  • Tera Dil Hai Islambaad K Red Zone Jesa,

  • Main Imran Khan Ban K Wahan Dharna Dun Ga,

  • ****************************************

  • Teacher-What should be in a book to make it a best seller,

  • Pappu-A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl,

  • ****************************************

  • Koi gham Ne magar dill udas hy

  • zyada Matt socho ye sab bakwas hy ,

  • ****************************************

  • Aandhiyaan yun chalin k dil ujarr k reh gaya,

  • ay vekhien faraz meri akh vich ki pe gaya,

  • ****************************************

  • Wo roz roz kahti ke mujhe apni tasweer MMS kardo,

  • Koi Ja ke unse kah day mera pas simple Nokia 1202 set hai,

  • ****************************************
  • Us ne apny Birthday par ye kah kar pareshan kardi (Faraz)

  • Koi Gift na lana bas 1 kilo cheeni kahen se leke lana

  • ****************************************

  • Meri Girl friend bhi I phone 20 jaisi hai

  • abhi tak launch hi nhi hui

  • ****************************************

  • Aye Dost Mere Khosh Rahe Tu Sada

  • Teri Shadi Per Dil Ye Mera Deta Hai Duwa

  • ****************************************

  • Najane kis baat pe tum hum se naraz ho dost…

  • khuwab main bhi milte ho to kaddu jesa mun bana lete ho:

  • ****************************************

  • Wo roz roz kahti ke mujhe apni tasweer MMS kardo

  • Koi Ja ke unse kah day mera pas simple Nokia 1202 set hai

  • ****************************************

  • Mairi pairon talay zameen nikal gayi “Faraz”

  • Jab Girl Friend ne kaha “Rs 50 ka load tu karwa do

  • ****************************************

  • Sardar Apni Shadi Pe Udaas Tha Kisi Ne Poocha Kya Bat Hai

  • Sardar- Mere Susral Ne Barat Pe Thoray Logon Ka Kaha Hai
  • Pata Nai Abba Mujhe Le Jata Hai Ya Nahi

  • ****************************************

  • Mairi doston ki pehchan itni mushkil nahi Faraz

  • Wo sab say agay hotay hain jahan chawal taqseem hotay hain

  • ****************************************

  • Ishq Kernai Walon Ka Yehi Anjam Hota Hai

  • Kabhi Nazla Kabhi Khansi Kabhi Zukaam Hota Hai

  • ****************************************

  • Q:-) Why did Santa fall out the window

  • A:-) He was ironing the curtain

  • ****************************************

  • Aaj Yaroo Phir Ham Se Ho Gaey Ek Bhool

  • Tohfe Mein De Diya Os Ko Ghobi Ka Phool

  • ****************************************

  • Ab too iss darr say rona he chor diya FARAZ,,

  • Kaheen humaaray aansoon pay dengue anday he na chor jaee,,

  • ****************************************

  • Teacher-Qayamat ky din zameen phat jiay g aasman tukry tukry ho jiay ga,,

  • Pathan-Sir to kia us din school say chuti ho g,,

  • ***********************************

  • Pathan Galti Se Samunder Me Gir Gaya,,
  • Doobte Doobte Uske Hath Me Machli Aayi,,
  • Use Pakad Kar Bahar Pheka Aur Bola Ja Tu Toh Apni Jan,,

  • Bacha Le.............

  • ***********************************

  • Aaj Yaroo Phir Ham Se Ho Gaey Ek Bhool,,

  • Tohfe Mein De Diya Os Ko Ghobi Ka Phool,,

  • ***********************************

  • Ap Ki Smile Ne Sare Jahan Ko Hila Diya,,

  • Coma Se Jage Howe Mareez Ko Dara Kar Sula Diya,,

  • ***********************************

  • Bazahir Wo Mera Khayal Karti Hai,,

  • Jhoot Bolti Hai Magar Kamal Karti Hai,,

  • ***********************************

  • Micheal jakson k esaal e sawab k liye plz ap,,

  • 2 THUMKAY mar k ye msg fwd kr dain,,

  • ***********************************

  • Question:-)Bahooo aik gear marad ke sath sari 
  • raat ghar se bahar rahi aur saas ne kuch nahi kaha Kyon,,

  • Ans:-) Kyon ki saas bi kabhi bahoo thi,,,

  • ***********************************

  • Tere Hathoun k taqadus ka Khyaal Ata hai Warna,

  • Warna Yasu Panju ma to hum Maaf Kia Nahi Kartay,,

  • ***********************************

  • Saas-Naya chawal aaya hy pakane me kaisa hy,

  • Bahu-Bilkul aap k bete jesa hy charhte hi 
  • pak jata hy foran pani chor deta hy is lye foran utarna parta hai

  • ***********************************

  • When buying gifts for women the most 

  • important thing to remember is the receipt

  • so that she can change it:--P

  • ***********************************

  • berking news khuzdar may ak na malom afard 

  • na motor cikel per do bando ko

  • slam kia or bola happy new year

  • ***********************************

  • Larki ka bap larki se:-- jise tum pasand karti ho 

  • us k pas bangala car jaidad he

  • Larki:-- toba he sub mard 1 jese hote hen 

  • wo bhi aap k bare ma yahi puch raha tha

  • ***********************************

  • PAPPU Biwi Se:- Pani Pila Do

  • Biwi : Kya Pyaas Lagi Hai
  • PAPPU Gussey se-- Nahi Gala Check Karna Hai Kahin 
  •                    se-LEAK-to Nahi Hai =P xD

  • ***********************************

  • Practical Definition

  • What is Love
  • Answer by a boy – Love is the 7th sense of human 
  • which destroys all 6 senses n make the person nonsense

  • ***********************************

  • Dabbay Main Dabba Dabay Main Khargosh
  • Uncle Nay Aankh Mari Aunty BayHosh…

  • :-D:-D

  • ***********************************

  • WifeStanding In Front Of Mirror I Am Fat Old ,,

  • Wrinkled & No Longer Pretty Will U Still Give Me Any Compliment

  • Husband:--
  • Ur Eyesight Is Still Excellent

  • ***********************************

  • Wife pointing at a couple next door says to her husband,

  • Look at him he kisses her all the time can’t u do that,

  • Husband-I tried but she slapped me

  • ***********************************

  • Pathan Ki 2 Beveyan Lar PariAik Boli K Aaj ,

  • Sunday HayOr 2sari Boli Ni Aaj Mondy Hay,

  • PATHAN Tang Aa K Bola

  • Hum Kya Pagal Hun Jo Juma Parh K Aya Hun

  • ***********************************

  • Us ki zulfon ki chaoon main jab se soya hun Faraz

  • Allah di qasmy merian te juaan e nai 
  • mukdiyan--
  • Ammi Breek Kangi ,,, Daeen

  • ***********************************

  • Teacher:-Batao k quick quicker quickest,

  • forms ko hindi main kese kahen ge

  • Student :- Bhaag Abay BhaaagBhaag teri maaaa ki

  • ***********************************

  • Har ek boy ki dil ki khwaaish hoti hai...

  • khud kitne bade kaminey honge

  • par larki shareef chahiye...

  • ***********************************

  • Hum Chat Par Charhe Patang Urane Ke Bahane,

  • Wo Bhi Chat Par Aayi Kapde Sukhane Ke Bahane,

  • Uske Mummy Ne Jo Dekha Ye Haseen Nazara

  • Jhadu Le Aayi Wo Bandar Bhagane Ke Bahane

  • ***********************************

  • U To Hum Bhi Madad Kia Nahi Karte,
  • ,
  • Choclate Kya Toffy Bhi Dia Nahi Karte,

  • Ye DOSTI Sirf Apse Hai Warna Msg To Ky,

  • Hum Kisi Ko Number Bhi Dia Nahi Karte,

  • ***********************************

  • Mere Dost Tanhai Me Na Waqt Bitaya Karo

  • Kabhi Kabhi Mehfilon Me Bhi Aaya Karo

  • Kiya Hua Jo Toot Gaye Hen Samney K 4 Dant

  • Phir Bhi Moun Khol Ker Muskuraya Karo

  • ***********************************

  • Bhikhari-Saab 1 rupaya de do؛

  • Saheb:-- Kal aana Kal,,

  • Bhikhari:-- is kalkal ke chakkar mein is colony ,,

  • mein mere lakhon rupaye phanse huye hain

  • ***********************************

  • Husband:- Tum Meri Kis Cheez Se Sabse Jyada Impress Ho

  • Life Style Car Bank Balance,,

  • Biwi:-Tumhare romance Se Tumhare Jesa romance 

  • pure Mohalle Mein Kisi Ko Nahi Aata

  • ***********************************

  • first friend: yar aaj main nay PC hotel main ,,

  • sirf 50 ropay main khana khaiya

  • 2nd friend: naheen yaar woh kaisay

  • ist friend: yaar bill to 2000 bana tha unhoan nay 

  • police ko bulwa liya aur main nay 50 ropay day ka jan churwai,,

  • ***********************************


  • Mein to pehle hi Uskey Bhai se Buri tarah pit chuka hon,,

  • Faraz

  • Ab woh kehti hai “to Phir Aao Mujhko Satao”

  • ***********************************


  • Son:papa jab sab shadi kar ke 

  • pareshan hai tu shadi kyu kartay hai,,
  • Papa: Beta aqal badam khanay

  • Se nahi Thokar kha ke aati hai...

  •  

  • ***********************************

  • Sardarni-Lo light chali gayi

  • Sardar--Light chali gayi hai to fan chala do,,

  • Sardarni--Lo fir se kar di na sardaro wali baat 

  • Agar fan chalaunga to mombatti bujh nahi jayegi

  • ***********************************

  • im at the police stationThe police caught me & filed a case,,

  • against me possession of good looks i m doomed i need

  • someone ugly 2 bail me outso hurry up,,,

  • ***********************************

  • Doctor owr Allah ko khabi naraz mat karna

  • Kionke jab Allah naraz hota hai tu wo Doctor ke pas bhej daita hai

  • Owr jab Doctor naraz hota hai tu wo Allah ke pas bhej daita hai....


  • ***********************************

  • Biwi shohar se-Mai ghar chor kar ja rahi hun,,

  • Shohar ghusse se-Jaan choro,,

  • Biwi- Yeh aap ki Jaan kehne ki aadat bhi naa mujhe hamesha rok leti hai..,

  • ***********************************

  • Santa ne Banta se kaha”Sabse bada challenge kya hai

  • Banta replied – Answer sheet ko khaali chod do aur last me likh dena

  • paas karke dikha

  • ***********************************

  • Aik pathab ne Veena Malik se masjid ka chanda manga,,

  • Veena-ap log to kehte hen k mera paisa naapak hai

  • Pathan-tumhary paison se hum BATHROOM banaey gy,,

  • ***********************************

  • ROWDY SMS Jab mai SMS karta Hu To 

  • samjho mai tumhe yaad karraha hu

  • Or…

  • jab me SMS nhi karta To smjho me tumhe DEFNITLY ,,

  • yaad kar raha hu GUD morning ha ha ha

  • ***********************************

  • Pathan-Mobile Me Kuch songs Load Krwane Hein…

  • Dukandar-Memory Card Hy

  • Pathan-Shanaakhti Card hai Memory card to abhi nahi banwaya..,,

  • ***********************************

  • Science Teacher: Bachcho zinda rahne ke liye kya zaruri hai,,

  • Student:-- itna bhi nahi pata mam

  • Zinda rehne ke liye teri qasam,,

  • ek mulaqat zaruri hai sanam

  • ***********************************

  • Wife-I saw in my dream

  • that u were buying a diamond ring 4 me,,

  • Husband : i saw your dad paying da bill

  • ***********************************

  • Lo G Ab Peshawar K Pathano Ne Ek Aur Faisla Kya Hai

  • Agar Saudi Arab Main Baarish Hogi To

  • Peshawar K Saray Pathan Chhatri Le Kar Ghoomain Gay..

  • ***********************************

  • Girl to boy- Tum larkay kisi larki mei,,

  • sub se pehlay kia daikhte ho

  • Boy-Yeh tou depend karta hai k

  • larki aa rahi hay ya ja rahi hai …:p

  • ***********************************

  • Mohabaat mein Dil Torne ke Liye Itna He Kafi hai,

  • Faraz

  • Ap Ka Matluba Number Dosri Line Pr Masruf Hai,

  • ***********************************

  • Likhna Parhna chhad de bandeya Nekiyan te rakh aass

  • Chuk Chaadar tey soja bandya Rab karey ga pass..

  • Students ka sufiana kalam

  • ***********************************

  • Larkiyoon or Popcorn mein kya similarti hai..,

  • Simple..

  • dono ko thOra sa jalao to munh phula kar beith jaty hain …

  • ***********************************

  • Lahore or iske mazafat mein light jane ka waqt hua chahta hai…
  • ,
  • Baqi loag apne apne muqami waqt k mutabiq

  • LESC ko gaalian dein,

  • ***********************************

  • Son:papa 5+5 how much

  • Sardar:Ullehke patte gadhe ke aulath 

  • nalayath besharam tujhe kuchbi nahi ata,

  • ja jake andarse caliculater la,,

  • ***********************************

  • Sardar-aapaan te roti roz kukar nal khaee dee a,,
  • ,
  • Dost-es mehngaee vich keevain

  • Sardar-ek burkee aap khaee dee a te ek kukar noo pai dee a,

  • ***********************************

  • Shaadi Se Agle Din Patni GusseSe Pati Se Boli,,

  • Patni-SubahSubah Mere Chehre Pe Pani Kyun Dala ,,


  • Pati-Tere Baap Ne Kaha Tha Ke Meri Beti Phool Ki,,

  • Tarah Hai Ise Murjhane Mat Dena ,,
funny joks,urdu funny joks,urdu funny shayari urdu 2015,urdu very funny jokes,urdu new funny sms,funny shayari in urdu coment,funny shayari in urdu faraz,funny shayari in urdu 2 line,urdu funny shayari 2014,funny shayari in urdu for sutdents,urdu funny shayari love,funny shayari in urdu facebook,urdu funny shayari in hindi,funny shayari in facebook,funny joke in urdu for facebook,funny jokes in hindu for whatsaap,funny jokes for whatsaap girl,funny girl love sms,funny email this joke to a friend,funny joke hindi 2 line.



No comments:

Post a Comment