Rajini Jokes in Jokes latest collections



Dis msg is being Sent by Rajnikant
In the Interest of Humanity.......#####

"Guys Plz Stop making Jokes on Me,
Otherwise I will Delete
The forward option.......#####
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Rajnikanth Apni Beti Ki Shadi Me Khud DJ Bana.
Aadhe Gante Bad Party Me Ek UFO Utra Or.......#####
Alien Nikal Kr Bola Plz Awaj Kam Kr Lijiye 
Mere Bete Ka Kal Exam H........#####
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Aaj subah bohut fogg(dhummas) tha,
Because rajnikant hukka pee raha tha........#####
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1 Bar Chand Pe 1 Makkhi Dikhai Di........##### 
Nasa K Officers Khush Ho Gaye.......#####
Life On Moon
Life On Moon
Baad Me Pata Chala
Rajnikant Patang Uda Rha Tha........#####
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Rajnikant & A Girl were
Playing Cards (Teen Patti).......#####
Rajnikant had 3 Ekkas (AAA)
But cud not win, Why?
Bcoz the Girl had 3 Rajnikants........#####
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Can you guess
Why is there lighting all over the world?
.
.
Because
.
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RAJNIKANTH is practicing cricket.......#####
That's all folks.......#####

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Do U Know Y Their Is Earthquake
In Japan Frequently........#####
Bcoz Rajnikant Lost His Mobile In
Japan Which Was On Vibration Mode........#####
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Thank God Kolavari Di was Sung by Rajnikant's 
Son-in-LawIf Rajni himself would have.......#####
Sungit thenit would have been declared
as National Anthem.......#####
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Rajnikant On Kbc.......#####
Amitabhji-
Rajniji Ke Lie Pehla Quistion Pesh Kia Jae..........#####
On Camputer Screen- Can I Use Life Line.......#####
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Breaking News:
Rajnikanth Purchases Two NANO Cars for
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Skating.......#####
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Once Rajnikanth
was playing cricket
in the monsoons.........#####
.
and
the Rain was
cancelled due to
the Match........#####
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There is no theory of evolution........#####
Just a list of creatures Rajnikant 
has allowed to live........#####

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When Rajnikant does a pushup,
he isn’t lifting himself up,
he’s pushing the Earth down........#####
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Barish hui aur bhig gaye hum, wah wah
Barish hui aur bhig gaye hum, wah wah
Are aage kya hua.......#####
Hona kya tha
"RAJNIKANTH"ne phoonk mari aur sukh gaye hum........#####
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Facebook founder Mark Zukerberg hospitalized 
with serious injury.........#####
How ??
.
.
.
Coz Rajnikanth poked him on Facebook........#####
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1ce James Bond shoots a prsn & say
I m Bond, James Bond........#####
Climax-
Bt d prsn catches d bullet & throws at Bond, n’ 
Bond dies d prsn says-
I m Kant, Rajnikant........#####
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Why does needle of Magnetic Compass
always point towards North.......#####
Because Rajnikanth lives in the
South and no one can point at him........#####
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English Movies Dubbed in Hindi.......#####
Hurt Locker – Ghayal Tijori
Batman- Ballebaj
She’s the man- Bobby darling
Blood diamond- Khooni Heera
Saw- Dekha
Saw2- Doabara Dekha
Saw3- Phirse Dekha
Saw4- Baar Baar Dekha
Superman,Spiderman,X-men,Hulk etc- Rajnikanth.......#####

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Once.RAJINIKANTH.and.GOD.were.fighting.........#####
RESULT:Aaaaj.Bhagwaan.uper.hai.........#####

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Darwaja khola to saap nikla,
Darwaja khola to saap nikla,
ACP bola daya ye ANNA HAZARE
To Rajnikanth ka bhi baap nikla........#####
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Who was the 1st INDIAN to use 4G.........#####
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Har bar Rajinikanth nahi hota yaar 
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Ans: It's Anil kapoor........#####
aG ,oG, lo G, suno G........#####
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Unbeatable love of Rajinikanth for his GF
Girlfriend: Mera koi picha karta rehta he
Rajinikanth: ok i'll Cut it,
Girlfriend: Hey where is my shadow?
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Why does rajnikanth wear sunglasses?
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To protect the sun from his eyes!
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1 Bar Narad Ji Ne Kuch Aisa Dekha K Wo Behosh Ho Gaye,,

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Takat Pane K Liye
Hanumanji Rajanikant Chalisa Padh Rahe The.........#####

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Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg.
After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died........#####
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Rajinikanth is a champion in the game 
"Hide n' seek" as no one can hide from Rajinikanth........#####
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Rajinikanth is a weapon created by God to 
use on doomsday to end the world........#####
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Aliens do indeed exist.
They just know better than to visit a 
planet that Rajinikanth is on........#####
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Where there is a will, there is a way........#####
Where there is Rajinikanth,
there is no other way.
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Rajinikanth doesn't bowl strikes,
he just knocks down one pin and 
the other nine faint out of fear........#####

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There is no such thing as global warming.
Rajinikanth was feeling cold,
so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up........#####
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Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc.
were added to the dictionary in the year 1949.
That was the year Rajinikanth was born........#####
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The statement "nobody can cheat death"
is a personal insult to Rajinikanth.
Rajni cheats and fools death everyday........#####
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Rajinikanth is the only man to ever defeat 
a brick wall in a game of tennis........#####
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Rajinikanth does not style his hair.
It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror........#####
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Rajinikanth proves Newton wrong all the time.
Every time he performs an action,
he simply eliminates anything and everything 
that can provide the reaction........#####
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Rajinikanth is a weapon created by
God to use on doomsday to end the world........#####
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Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his
teeth and boils the water with his own rage........#####
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Leading hand sanitizers claim they 
can kill 99.9 percent of germs.
rajanikanth can kill 100 percent 
of whatever he wants........#####
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There is no such thing as global warming.
Rajanikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up........#####
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Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, 
because Rajanikanth only recognizes the 
element of surprise.
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The square root of Rajanikanth is pain........#####
Do not try to square Rajanikanth,
the result is death.

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Rajanikanth does not know where you live,
but he knows where you will die.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify 
that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning,
that the spot belongs to Rajanikanth and
that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesn't say,
"Did you mean Rajanikanth? " It simply replies,
"Run while you still have the chance."
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Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel 
of Fortune and was the first to spin.
The next 29 minutes of the show consisted 
of everyone standing around awkwardly,
waiting for the wheel to stop.
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When Rajanikanth gives you the finger,
he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
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Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing 
people faster than Death can process them.
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When Rajanikanth enters a room,
he doesn't turn the lights on........he turns the dark off.
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When Rajanikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters,
because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Rajanikanth and Rajanikanth.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Rajanikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss...
The next day announcement was made...
Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss 
confession room me aaye..
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When Rajnikant logs on to facebook.com, 
facebook updates its status message!
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Rajnikanth bought 2 elephants,
2 camels and 2 horses from the zoo Why?
To Play chess!!!!!!
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Once Rajnikanth said to a quite shy girl 
"plz talk something"..
Now that girl is known as..
Dolly Bindra
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Rajnikanth don't have a Twitter account,
Because no one can follow him and he's 
already following you.
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If you spell Rajnikanth wrong on
Google it doesn't say,
"Did you mean Rajnikanth?" 
It simply replies,
"Run while you still have the chance."
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The Square Root Of Rajnikanth
Is Pain. Do Not Try To
Square Rajnikanth,
The Result Is Death.
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If Rajnikanth would have born 100 years back,
British would have fought to get independence.
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Rajnikanth wrote a check without 
any bank balance and the bank bounced.

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Rajinikant is so fast,
he can run around the world and punch 
himself in the back of the head.
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Rajinikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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Once Dinosaurs borrowed money frm Rajnikanth 
n refused 2pay him back..
That was d last time.
After that no one saw Dinosaurs.
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One nite, while asleep,
Rajnikanth was mumbling some random numbers...
Thats how the Log table was invented.
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Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss...
The next day announcement was made...
Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aaye..
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The statement "nobody can cheat death"
is a personal insult to Rajnikanth.
Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.

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When Rajnikanth is asked to kill some one he doesn't know,
he shoots the bullet and directs it the day he finds out.
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Rajinikanth sneezed only once in his entire life,
that's when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.
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Rajnikant.. 
once wrote his Autobiography - The book is today 
known as The Guiness Book of World Records!
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Rajnikant got into a fight with Superman.
The loser had to wear his underwear over 
his pant for the rest of his life. ;)
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Once Dinosaurs borrowed money frm 
Rajnikanth n refused 2pay him back..
That was d last time.
After that no one saw Dinosaurs.
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Rajnikanth laughs at you and your silly 
jokes about him even before you think them up.
So don't bother..

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People Who Set Questions
For CAT Paper..
Will Have To Pass RAT Paper
From This Year Onwards..
RAT PAPER:
(RAJANIKANT APTITUDE TEST)
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Gabbar: Kitne Aadmi Thi ?
Kaliya: Sarkar 1
Gabbar: Aur Tum ?
Kaliya: 100
Gabbar: Fir Whi Wapis Paa Gye Wo
Bhi Khali Hath, Kon Tha Woh ?
Kaliya: RAJNIKANT
Gabbar: Opps! Sorry Bhai!!
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Once Rajanikant Decided To
Stare At The Sun, The Sun
Got Scared And Hid Itself
Behind The Moon..
Later This Situation Was
Named As "Solar Eclipse"..!
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Rajnikant In Ipl.
Climax:
1 Ball 23runs Needed To Win.
Bowler Bowls
Rajni Hits.
Ball Splits In 4pieces.
Al Pieces Go Fr 6s.
Chennai Wins!
Yenna Rascala.!!
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Breaking News:
Rajnicant Purchases
Two Nano Cars For..
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..
Skating.. ;)
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Once Rajnikant Tried Horse
Riding Without A Horse,
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Now That Is Known As
Gangnam Style...

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Rajnikant: Aaj Mere Kutte
Ne Anda Diya.
Big B: Kutta Kab Se
Anda Dene Laga?
Rajnikant: Ye Rajni Ka Style
Hai. Maine Apni Murgi Ka
Naam Kutta Rakha Hai
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Rajnikant Opens A College
But
Students R Confusd
Bcoz
Name Of College Is..

'Rajnikant Medical College Of
Engineering For Commrce & Arts'
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Once Rajnikant Playing Dhol
During Garba.

Suddenly An Alien Come There
And Says.
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Bhaiya Thoda Dhire Bajao Kal
Se Mere Bete K Exams Hai...
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Once Rajnikanth Became The
Coach Of Indian Cricket Team And
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Guess Wha India Won The
Fifa World Cup ....?/

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A Long Time Ago, Two Men
Made A Joke On Rajnikant...?
Now They Are Known As
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....
..
...
....
Santa And Banta.
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Rajnikant Ne Robot Film Kyu
Banayi..?
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Kyuki Wo Dikhana Chahta Tha Ke
Aurat Sirf Aadmi Ka Hi Nahi,
Machine Ka Bhi Dimag Kharab Kar
Sakti Hai...???

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Facebook's Co Founder
Mark Zuckerberg Was
Hospitalized For A
Serious Injury Sources
Revealed That "Rajnikant
Poked Zuckerberg On Facebook...."
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Rajnikant Creates New Email Id:
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Gmail@rajnikant.Com
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Hackers Dies..
Virus Cries..
Google Shocks.
Computer Blocks..
Rajnikant Rocks..
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Once Rajnikant Forgot His Toys
In America When He Was Small....
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Now That Place Is Known As
"Disney Land".....
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Rajnikant Ka Mobile Balconi
Se Gir Gya. Rajnikant Niche
Pahuncha To Mobile Nhi Mila?
Kyun?
Kyun Ki Rajnikant Mobile Se
Pehle Niche Pahunch Gya......
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When RAJNIKANT switch on his AC
without closing the door.
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
:)
Winter starts in INDIA?
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Teacher-
Agar raat me machhar kaate to kya karna chahie?.
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Santa- Chup chaap khujaakar so jana
Chahie qki aap RAJNIKANT to ho nahi
Jo machhar se sorry bulwa
loge.......

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Vo kaun aadmi hai
Jo ek hath se 100 gadi rok shakta hai....????
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TRAFFIC POLICE yaar...
Tum bhi na ...
Har bar rajnikant nahi aata..
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JAMES BOND comits sucide after
Watching Rajni's Film.
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.
WHY.?
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Rajni had empty gun,
Villain fired at him;
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He Catches the BULLET puts
It in his gun & kills the villain....
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DHOOM 3
Jhohn, Rhritk and Amir on BIKE
Wid speed of 200km/hr
&
.
Rajanikant overtakes them
Wid Bicycle n says
"Beta Save Fuel Use cycle":)
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Why did British leave India in 1947 only?
Because they came to know that
Unka baap RAJNIKANTH was
Going to born in 1948. .....
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People Update Status
Via BlackBerry,
IPhone,
IPad, Etc..
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Rajinikanth Updates Status
Via Calculator...
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Cant beat this one-
Rajnikanth's dog's house
Has a signboard on it, saying..
.

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Maalik Se Sawdhan. ...

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